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Dilemma with my Filipina girlfriend: What should we do?


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#1 WWu777

Posted 28 June 2008 - 06:44 AM

Hi all,
I've been wanting to get something off my chest for a long time now. The relationship between me and Dianne is not as rosy, wonderful, or peaceful as I might have portrayed it. During the year we've been together, we've been in a real topsy turvy situation and in an irreconcilable drama loop. Right now we are on a vacation from each other, or a "break" so to speak, to cool off. This has happened almost every other month during the year that we've been together, even while she was pregnant.

Basically, she keeps me on a leash almost 24/7, never lets me go anywhere alone without her, and constantly yells at me, bosses me around, gets angry all the time, behaves like a drama queen, and get this, often hits me now out of anger, not only in private but even in public too, whenever I look at other girls. She hits me in the face and sometimes even in the eyes! Other girls I know who have witnessed it have even admitted that it's excessive, even for a jealous Filipina. They feel sorry for me and see Dianne as a violent person out of control. She wasn't like this before, but now uses hitting as a way of controlling me.

And my new expat friends who've seen how she bosses me around told me, "She's got you man! You should have never let her take control of you like that. They will if you let them. At first they act submissive and innocent and easy going, but that's just a facade. Once you're theirs, they got all the control."

Anyhow, I can't tolerate it, and a guy can only take all the yelling and hitting for so long. It's draining and somewhat suffocating too.

You see, she wants me to be this goody two shoes, totally monogamous guy who has no interest in any other females, never even looking at them, and being totally giving and generous to her, never complaining about cost. That's her ideal guy and relationship.

Well I can't be like that, even if I wanted to. And as you know, you can't be something you're not. She doesn't really understand me, and even if she did, she can't accept the way I am. You see, I'm in the heart of a "sex disneyland" right now and everywhere there are sexy girls and even model type girls with killer figures. To expect me not to look at any of them would be like putting Michaelangelo or Leonardo DaVinci in the biggest art museum in the world and expect them not to look at any of the paintings or artifacts. It's just not realistic. (And if I do, I get hit in the face!)

Furthermore, looking at the big picture, if I don't take advantage of the opportunities I have here, of living my fantasy with girls who fit my Asian female fantasy image, I'll regret it forever after I leave the Philippines. If we end up back in suburban America, I know I'll squirm every night knowing that I could have lived so many fantasies with so many women that fit my desires and fantasy image, that I never did, simply because one woman prevented it all. That would suck big time, to end up in regret like that.

It's like this is the opportunity I've been waiting for for 15 years, and I finally have it, but I'm in shackles unable to do anything about it due to the societal pressures of monogamy and extreme control from my partner. That just really sucks and makes me really unhappy. And it makes me squirm every day too.

There are just wayyyyyy too many girls to choose from here, even among the hotties, any one of which would be unattainable in the US. Thus, for guys like me, it's just way too much to ask to expect us to "stick to one" as Filipinas like to say. The irony is that though there are too many attractive girls to choose from, each one of them wants deep down inside to be the only one.

Here I am able to live my fantasy with Asian women every night if I want to. I have opportunities unheard of in the US, and reserved only for CEO's and NFL stars. The other day, at a pool party with 7 Filipina girls in a classy neighborhood, a fellow Asian American expat told me that he could never live this type of life in the US, having so many young girls at his swimming pool. I replied, "Yep, that kind of thing is only reserved for CEO's and football/baseball stars."

Plus, since freedom is the biggest thing for me, having all my freedom taken away 24/7 feels like a prison to me. It leaves me unhappy, and Dianne can see it too. She complains that I don't look as happy, attentive and focused with her as I do when I'm flirting or courting other girls. And that's probably true cause being with the same person everyday loses its novelty, the stimulation wears off. It's not that I don't love her. I love her very much and our baby too. But I can't be what she wants, at least not now. Beautiful women are my NUMBER ONE passion in life, and no matter what society says about how I idealistically ought to be totally monogamous and a goody two shoes father and family man, that doesn't change my number one passion.

What's ironic is that she says that my having other girls is the ONLY thing she wants me to change, but ironically, that's the ONLY thing I can't really change. Hence, even though we are very compatible in many areas and get along great personality-wise and in things we like to do for fun, this issue puts an irreconcilable wedge between us.

I've tried to find a compromise, such as making a deal where I be what she wants most of the week but she lets me go out and do what I want one or two nights a week (or even a month) but she will not agree to such compromises. She demands 100 percent monogamy or nothing. Those are her terms. She wants a guy who needs no one but her and never needs to go out and have fun, but it always completely committed to her.

In short, I can't be happy being what she wants me to be, but she can't be happy if she allows me to be what I want to be and give me some "freedom" in my life. It's a "no win" situation. And I don't see a win-win solution.

Eventually, this disagreement between us, our inability to change for each other and accept each other's terms, reaches a boiling point, resulting in her having had enough and storming out the door. When she leaves, she fires parting shots, bluffs and threats such as "you will never see me and Angelo again", "I never come back to you", "Don't contact me anymore", etc. She never really means those things though, she just says them out of anger. But in a day, a few days, or even a week, we end up feeling lonely and miserable without each other and then happily get back together again, and go back to the same routine.

But alas, the cycle repeats itself all over again, and the boiling point is reached again.

Thus, we've had "breaks" from each other about a dozen times now at least during the past year. Each time I get a vacation from her, I go out and enjoy the fruits and pleasures of "sex disneyland" again, screwing around and having more girls than I can handle. But then I start to feel empty and sad inside without Dianne and Angelo. Then, when I talk sweet to her and smile to her again, she returns to normal and is happy to be back together again. It seems that deep down, we both WANT to be together, not apart.

So again, we are now on a break from each other. This cycle never seems to stop. But what can we do about it?

Is it best for us to break up for good, living separate lives, and with me visiting the baby occassionally and supporting him? There does not seem to be a win-win solution between us. Again, I can't be happy being what she wants and she can't be happy letting me be who I am and giving me freedom. So what can we do? Keep repeating this cycle, or break up for good? Doesn't it seem inevitable? Or should we hurry and move to another country where I am no longer in "babe paradise"? Would that be the solution?

I know some of you probably think I'm chasing phantoms and temporary pleasures at the expense of having a loving wife and family. But if I don't, I become deeply unhappy and feel full of regret, that all my fantasies go unfulfilled. So what can I do?

And what can I do about Dianne hitting me? I keep telling her to stop it, but in response, she will say, "If you want me to stop hitting you, then stop looking at other girls!" putting the blame on me.

Either way, she is becoming more drama prone, loves to make a scene in public, overly expressive (which is why we connect probably), and also becoming more high maintenance and lazy.

I tried to get relationship counseling for us, but I was told people here do not go to shrinks or therapists. They solve their own family problems. We did have this bar manager act as a "Dr Phil" between us one time. He had the same practical no nonsense wisdom as Dr Phil does, but without the arrogance and BS feminism. He basically said we should not waffle in the "maybe zone" but be black and white in our relationship. Either we stay together and come to an agreement, or separate and make agreements regarding the baby. We made an agrement to stay together, and it was fine for a while, but the chain she has around my neck and the strict control 24/7 became too much for me. (I'm not even allowed to go out alone without her, anywhere) But she feels she has to do it to keep me under control.

Any comments or ideas?

#2 britmaveric

Posted 28 June 2008 - 11:52 AM

Support your baby, and be single. Not hard one to figure. I think its only fair if you can't remain faithful.

#3 Stocky

Posted 28 June 2008 - 12:41 PM

If this isn't BS I have to say you're an A1 prize plonker.

If you can't keep your dick in your pants you can't be in a serious relationship, certainly not an honest one. Given the above why the f### did you start a family?

As Brit says and ditto your bar tender shrink, separate and make agreements regarding the baby. Then you can go shag to your hearts content, but next time don't forget the wet suit.

#4 yohan

Posted 28 June 2008 - 04:32 PM

View PostWWu777, on 2008-06-28 15:44:44, said:

.....Basically, she keeps me on a leash almost 24/7, never lets me go anywhere alone without her, and constantly yells at me, bosses me around, gets angry all the time, behaves like a drama queen, and get this, often hits me now out of anger, not only in private but even in public too, whenever I look at other girls. She hits me in the face and sometimes even in the eyes! Other girls I know who have witnessed it have even admitted that it's excessive, even for a jealous Filipina. They feel sorry for me and see Dianne as a violent person out of control. She wasn't like this before, but now uses hitting as a way of controlling me.
.....
Any comments or ideas?
It's a difference if you are into PUA (pick-up-artist) or into MRA (men's rights activist), the first is looking for fun, the other one for a long term relationship.
Both at the same time doesn't really work out.

Philippine women might be as violent or worse than American women - if you cannot live with this woman, then leave her...or better you should not even start a long term relationship with child..

You made one mistake, as I said, a short friendship is one side, a long-term relationship needs some planning in advance. She cannot be out of sudden violent, she was violent before for sure.

I wonder if your girl can do that with a Filipino man, as some of them are quite violent too and will just hit back - but you are American, a freshman out of the huge US-sex-prison and do not know, what to do...

You must decide, what you want...maybe you and she like it in that way, some couples like to give spankings to each other...and if not, best is to leave her...

Edited by yohan, 28 June 2008 - 04:35 PM.


#5 WWu777

Posted 29 June 2008 - 10:57 AM

View Postbritmaveric, on 2008-06-28 19:52:21, said:

Support your baby, and be single. Not hard one to figure. I think its only fair if you can't remain faithful.


W:  But it's not that easy.  Don't you see?  When we are apart, we feel empty and miserable without each other.  We are either soulmates or co-dependent on each other.  So the solution is not that simple.  As they say, "women, you can't live with them and you can't live without them."

#6 zaphodbeeblebrox

Posted 29 June 2008 - 11:28 AM

She's can't control her anger.  You have to leave her.  Go ahead and support your child, but you're in an abusive relationship.  I just had to get out of one myself.  It's hard, but you have to do it.  Even if you were to be faithful, she is controlling and will continue to verbally and physically abuse you.

#7 MrFantabulous

Posted 29 June 2008 - 02:45 PM

View PostWWu777, on 2008-06-28 01:44:44, said:

Hi all,
I've been wanting to get something off my chest for a long time now. The relationship between me and Dianne is not as rosy, wonderful, or peaceful as I might have portrayed it. During the year we've been together, we've been in a real topsy turvy situation and in an irreconcilable drama loop. Right now we are on a vacation from each other, or a "break" so to speak, to cool off. This has happened almost every other month during the year that we've been together, even while she was pregnant.
Hey,

I can totally relate to a lot of this as I'm in a somewhat similar situation.  God plays a cruel joke by making men instinctually want to chase many women and women almost all fiercly monogamous.

It probably would be easier for us to stay in one relationship IF we were not surrounded by so many willing choices in women.  I think there are only two things that MIGHT make a man settle down with one woman and be happy.  The first is that he can't find a better woman. . .either because he was so lucky as to find the perfect wife who is more beautiful and compatible than any other woman he meets. . ( this is probably rare).

So he naturally doesn't even look at other woman and wouldn't do anything to threaten his relationship with her.   Another reason as you mentioned, why he can't find a better woman is that you live in a place where there is more competition and women don't see you as "unique" or "the prize" like they often will do in Asia.  Then you probably will just be grateful for the woman you have.    

The second reason why a man might happily settle down is that he has gone through a period of introspection and realized that the greatest good is if both he and his wife/girlfriend can both be happy.  IF he is basically content being with her and she is happy to have him as a FAITHFUL husband then then the greatest good is that they stay together.  ANd each time you think of being unfaithful. . .remember all the drama, and pain it will cost both of you.  Think about if you really want to risk that or go through that.  Remember that probably any woman you flirt with. . .if you really got to know her you will find she has many things that annoy you or bore you and the exciting passion of initial romance will fade fairly quickly.  At the risk of sounding corny. . if your wife REALLY loves you than that is probably the most important thing she can give you.  And probably something you might not find so easily again in another woman.  (lots of women might have ulterior motives for being with you.)

Your wife is hitting you and keeping you on a tight leash because she rightfully knows that you will screw around.  So of course she feels a LOT of anger and frustration towards you.  I think you would have to work HARD AND LONG to regain her trust.  Of course hitting you is not the right way for her to deal with it. And it makes you resent her and feel trapped by her.      .but she feels helpless and insecure.  And lots of asians do express there anger physically. . .I guess that would be a good topic for another thread..  but they see their parents do it the same way growing up.   My girlfriend will sometimes jab me in the gut or slap me LIGHTLY in the face or on the ass. . but she says she is just joking around when she does it.  All the same I don't like it and tell her so.  Because I don't want it to escalate.  I'm a lot stronger than her and can easily restrain her if she is getting physically violent during a fight. . but I really don't want our arguments to get physical. . I'd rather keep it at the human level and not the animalistic level.  Lots of asian girls are VERY dramatic.  Look at the soap operas they watch.  

Of course it is unfortunate there is a child in the picture.  I'm guessing it happened accidentally.  I'm just glad I don't have that further complication in my own relationship right now.  But what happened has happened.  You need to decide if you want to be monogamous with her or not.  Basically you have to make a sacrifice here. ...MAKE A CHOICE.   Decide what is most important to you.  You will have some regrets whichever choice you make.  But ask yourself which you will regret most?  Leaving her permanantly OR missing an opportunity to be a "Playboy".  

I remember a famous womanizer, Marlon Brando, who could get any woman he wanted say in his advanced years that he really regretted that he had wasted so much of his life in "chasing women".  This is a guy who has LOTS of children with different women.  But one of his children was put in jail for murder and he had a daughter who committed suicide (after her brother murdered her boyfriend).  This all took a huge toll on him.  

What do others advise??

#8 กำนัน

Posted 29 June 2008 - 07:23 PM

There's nothing wrong with womanising, if that's the lifestyle choice you make... indeed, you should do whatever makes you happy within the confines of the broader view of the law... with the important caveat that if what you're doing is hurting others, especially those you love, then you're doing something very wrong...

Frankly speaking howeer, I've heard more maturity from a 16 year old boy than in the opening post of this thread... I propose the following therapy...

Mrs Wu should take a visit from me and all of my friends for a jolly good shafting. I'm sure it'd make her feel much better about your clumsy philandering... and when she rubs your face in it and makes you look like a c*ck in front of your friends (as you did with her), it'll give you a healthy dose of reality.

#9 sceadugenga

Posted 30 June 2008 - 01:55 AM

An expat who chooses to live in Angeles City is there for one reason only.
It's not like Pattaya in that there's lots of exciting things to do other than pay for sex, in Angeles even driving down to the beach at Subic Bay can be tedious. The traffic is a night mare and the roads are appalling. A 200km journey from Angeles to La Union once took me nearly seven hours.
So it's a one trick town. SOP is to get yourself a little honey-ko, a good looking girl to have at home, then whore around on the side.

There are two principal ways of doing this, you go for a walk during the day and seperate from the main nightlife area there are small bars that are open early, like around noon. These are simply brothels with rooms out the back and discretion and safe sex is part of the deal.

The other alternative is to go out at night and frolic in the big bars. Everybody knows each other here, alcohol flows freely and safe sex is only an option. If there is one person around who knows your girlfriend, she will receive a phone call the minute you walk out of a bar with the current evenings entertainment on your arm. You be surprised how many men factor this in.

There is a third way, and that's hunting the shop girls who work in the malls or waitress in the hotels. This is extremely dangerous as they have a tendency to knock on your door looking for you. Some even bring their father who wants to discuss lost virginity with you. He may have his gun as well.
Some guys delude themselves that this is not paying for sex however.  :D

Edited by sceadugenga, 30 June 2008 - 01:58 AM.


#10 hobbler

Posted 30 June 2008 - 03:15 AM

Used to work with a guy who got a divorce because his wife wouldn't let him f### other women.
Sounds like you're having the same problem, where you're being complete idiots.

Let me get this straight.  Whenever you get time away from her, you use it to go f### around with hookers, right?  Why the hell would you be surprised that she's caught on to this little game and that's why she doesn't want you to go anywhere without her?  When have you given her reason to think that if you're not under her thumb 24/7, you won't immediately trip and accidentally stick your dick in some bargirl?

As for the hitting, Stop whining and f###ing around with the girl.  Get on with "living the life", whatever that is.  All your doing now is wasting her time, your time, and our time.  If the relationship has turned that sour, there's not much that can be done.  You're obviously not willing to be considerate of her feelings and I don't really see her being considerate of your facial structure unless there are massive changes on both sides.

#11 Thehighlander

Posted 30 June 2008 - 05:33 AM

Winston,
It sounds to me like you like this violence, she is in control of this situation and you like it that way. The first day she raised her hands is the day you should have stopped it!! There is no point in bleating on a forum about this, you have a decision to make. You either stay with her and take your beatings like a man or you head for the door,support the child you and she decided to bring into the world.
I think this girl has got you over a barrel, and the baby will be used as a bargaining chip to keep you in line. If it was me I would have been on the move the first time she lifted her hands. The child is the issue here, not you or her.
Grow a pair of balls tell her you are on your way as you are not happy with the situation.Tell her you will support your child but not her. Leave the next step to her? One thing for sure she does not trust you one f*****g inch and it looks like you have given her lots of reasons for that.

#12 hobbler

Posted 30 June 2008 - 05:55 AM

What cracks me up is that he let her start hitting him as long as it wasn't in the face, or in public.  Now that it's in public, in the face, that's just not cool!  :D

#13 sceadugenga

Posted 30 June 2008 - 06:05 AM

Just paying for the kid isn't an option in the PI, whatever money is handed over will be to the mother.
My mate's got a clothing factory there and fathered a boy off a two week relationship. He's forked out for furniture, a TV, cash and is now under pressure to buy a house.
He still rides bare back but he's had a vasectomy.

#14 captain

Posted 30 June 2008 - 06:42 AM

:D     B)     :D     B)     :D just remembering the first post     :D     :D     :D  :lol:

#15 romanv

Posted 30 June 2008 - 09:52 AM

Perhaps you should take up karate.

#16 theloneranger

Posted 04 July 2008 - 05:39 PM

Hi

i was married to a filipina, we were both in our early 30's when we gor married in UK. After reading your story, i can sympathize also as my gf would hit me and shout at me in public, it was very embarrassing. Actually my marriage to her was a nightmare from hell, something i only saw on tv documentaries. She was extremely violent and would hit me and swear at me regularly and often smash the house up.  I stayed with her our of compassion for two years before enough was enough. Alot of her anger and jealously problems were dependent on problems in her childhood. She was abandoned as a child twice and worked as a bar girl from the age of 15 years old, although she attended school and was quite well educated. My problem was that i thought i could change her, how wrong i was. Her problem was that she had no logic or common sense at all so it was always impossible for us to sort out our problems. She would never take any responsibility at all, but blamed everything on me. Actually i'm very calm guy and never usually get angry much but i will never ever put myself in that situation again. My new girlfriend is thai and really calm and very gentle.

I never tell people what to do, you must use your wisdom to work this one out.  I don't really know about your girlfrinds mind and i don't know your relationship with her so it's diffcult to make a judgement. I know filipina's and the culture very well as i lived in manila and cebu for 2 years.

Maybe go away for a while and communicate from afar, tell her you love her and want to make it work but give her some conditions that should not be broken if you return.

1. She must see a councillor/anger management course
2. She must take personal responsibility for her actions and stop blaming others
3. No verbal abuse or violence!
4. Let you have your own space

Maybe you can buy her this book, it's really very good and it's written by a well known and revered Buddhist Monk. It's a great read for both of you!

http://www.amazon.co...c...638&sr=1-47

here's thich nhat hanh on tube taking some vietnam vets on retreat, very inspiring!

http://www.youtube.c...h?v=bXQhspVJKxY

Also don't fall for any blackmailing!  Good luck!

Also don't be fooled that living your fantasies will be without alot of problems, i lived that lifestyle in the Philippines for two years.  But you can see with the hollywood superstars that too much of a good thing often sends you crazy and leaves you feeling empty.  The more desires you carry in your mind the more crazy you will become.  My problem in the Philippines was that, that even though i was working i was bored out of my head so i just went to the pub everynight and thats where all my troubles started.  I remember Sky Cable boring me out of my brains!  Much better to go out at the weekend instead of everynight. find something constructive to do during the week. Too much of a good thing is bad for your health, lol :rolleyes:


Also don't fall for any blackmailing!  Good luck!

#17 Bluecat

Posted 05 July 2008 - 07:34 AM

View PostWWu777, on 2008-06-28 13:44:44, said:

Basically, she keeps me on a leash almost 24/7, never lets me go anywhere alone without her, and constantly yells at me, bosses me around, gets angry all the time, behaves like a drama queen, and get this, often hits me now out of anger, not only in private but even in public too, whenever I look at other girls.

Well, a few of my friends are married to Filipina girls and, if it is of any comfort, you're not the only one suffering from the overboard jealousy of those girls.
Never saw the hitting part but I'm sure they do it.

#18 sceadugenga

Posted 05 July 2008 - 10:51 AM

I don't know where they get it from, if they tried it on a Philippino man they'd need to make sure their hospital insurance was up to date.

#19 britmaveric

Posted 05 July 2008 - 11:47 PM

Wonder where the op is? :rolleyes:

#20 sceadugenga

Posted 06 July 2008 - 02:20 AM

C*ck stuck to the mattress?  :rolleyes:

#21 TizMe

Posted 06 July 2008 - 02:41 AM

Do Filipinos feed man meat to the ducks?

#22 yohan

Posted 06 July 2008 - 07:58 AM

View Postsceadugenga, on 2008-07-05 19:51:58, said:

I don't know where they get it from, if they tried it on a Philippino man they'd need to make sure their hospital insurance was up to date.
You know really about the daily life in the Philippines.

Most families in Philippines are however too poor to pay for health insurance and there is no public health insurance. Btw, there is also no legal divorce procedure in Philippines.

Generally, in Philippines among poor people's daily life, the man is beating the girl, but there are many wild women, who will hit back...Philippines is dangerous for all, men and women, regardless if local or foreigner...

#23 sceadugenga

Posted 06 July 2008 - 11:22 AM

I'm not sure what your reply means Yohan but my post only referred to the fact that domestic violence is a common occurrence in the Philippines.
I'm fully aware that most people there can not afford hospital insurance and my comment was merely away of saying that the violence is usually reciprocal.
What does You know really about the daily life in the Philippines mean anyway?

#24 yohan

Posted 07 July 2008 - 03:03 PM

View Postsceadugenga, on 2008-07-06 21:22:35, said:

.....What does You know really about the daily life in the Philippines mean anyway?
Your replies related to Philippines show clearly, that you have been in Philippines before, were living there among very ordinary people, who do not own much...you have seen the real daily life in Philippines...not only some resort hotels for foreigners, who like to play golf.

#25 dcs1771

Posted 11 July 2008 - 05:28 PM

"It's a difference if you are into PUA (pick-up-artist)"
Yeah..do a google for wwu777...not the first time hes been in that situation.

My EX I lived with in Angeles started things off that way, but It wasnt hard to put and end to it.
I never hit her, but I also made it very clear I not her brother.
Took a couple times, but it sank in what I was trying to get accross.
She never hit me again the 2 years I lived with her.
But I didn't mind the yelling so much.
That is actually one of the things that attract me to the Pinay and even more so The Kapampangan woman, is her fiery side. I called her my "cili girl".

Health insurance in the Philippines? :rolleyes:

#26 Aromdee

Posted 11 July 2008 - 11:44 PM

I  am about to marry my Phili filly. Its my third time. This time I think I am prepared. You may think otherwise and I am all ears. An agreed legally lodged pre-nuptual agreement including no children for 3 years. She's Phili and I am English but we will not live in Phili or Blighty, but visit them when necessary. We live in LOS at the moment but that could change.

Vituperation is a little accepted psychologically violent act perpetrated mainly by women but it is violence and abuse. Women screaming at men to hit them and then reporting them for the violent act are just as guilty. The Western law is an ass and the reason many have left. Take this heed and stay away from the West with your Phili otherwise you are asking for trouble.

#27 sceadugenga

Posted 12 July 2008 - 03:58 AM

View Postdcs1771, on 2008-07-12 00:28:16, said:

"It's a difference if you are into PUA (pick-up-artist)"
Yeah..do a google for wwu777...not the first time hes been in that situation.

My EX I lived with in Angeles started things off that way, but It wasnt hard to put and end to it.
I never hit her, but I also made it very clear I not her brother.
Took a couple times, but it sank in what I was trying to get accross.
She never hit me again the 2 years I lived with her.
But I didn't mind the yelling so much.
That is actually one of the things that attract me to the Pinay and even more so The Kapampangan woman, is her fiery side. I called her my "cili girl".

Health insurance in the Philippines? :rolleyes:
Sure, right here... Health


View PostAromdee, on 2008-07-12 06:44:46, said:

I  am about to marry my Phili filly. Its my third time. This time I think I am prepared. You may think otherwise and I am all ears. An agreed legally lodged pre-nuptual agreement including no children for 3 years. She's Phili and I am English but we will not live in Phili or Blighty, but visit them when necessary. We live in LOS at the moment but that could change.

Vituperation is a little accepted psychologically violent act perpetrated mainly by women but it is violence and abuse. Women screaming at men to hit them and then reporting them for the violent act are just as guilty. The Western law is an ass and the reason many have left. Take this heed and stay away from the West with your Phili otherwise you are asking for trouble.
You mean live in a country where you can bash her senseless without her having recourse to the law?

#28 dcs1771

Posted 12 July 2008 - 05:04 AM

Agreed,

There is health insurance there, but none of the people I knew there even consider it due to the fact that day to day life consisted of making enough to feed the family for the day.

Also, just like car insurance there, the likelihood of getting a settlement "when it is needed" is little to nil.

I am not saying that is the case every time there,by any means.
And it is getting better.

The mother of my ex has SSS that she pays for annually and it works.

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#29 sceadugenga

Posted 12 July 2008 - 05:29 AM

When I was there there was an employer funded pension scheme as well.
My mate had a factory on Clark and nearly went to jail because his manager was nicking the contributions instead of paying them into the fund. The responsibility rested with the owner.

Edited by sceadugenga, 12 July 2008 - 05:30 AM.


#30 Aromdee

Posted 12 July 2008 - 07:53 AM

View Postsceadugenga, on 2008-07-12 10:58:17, said:

Sure, right here... Health



You mean live in a country where you can bash her senseless without her having recourse to the law?


Why are women more intelligent than men?
Because diamonds are a girl's best friend while man's best friend is a dog.

Edited by Aromdee, 12 July 2008 - 07:56 AM.



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