Philippines bar girl GF dilemma

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Philippines bar girl GF dilemma

#21 yohan

Posted 28 August 2009 - 06:38 PM

Bluecat, on 27 August 2009 - 11:26 PM, said:

....their ultimate goal, usually, is not money but finding a husband.
....And when they find one, they're as faithful as any other girl.
But more jealous.

In Philippines, there is no divorce in the lawbooks. And to get a nullification of your marriage contract can take many years and costs a lot of money.

Philippines is the only deeply conservative Catholic country in Asia.

Therefore the behavior of Filipina women, who are living in Philippines, who never had contacts with foreigners and were never out of their own country is very different from Western women, but also from other Asian women.

#22 YoungOne

Posted 31 August 2009 - 08:54 PM

Ok...I am now aware of the way things work in SEA, BG's are a no go and I give this advice to everyone. These girls didn't want anything from me though, so money was not a factor which amazed me. I was naive about everything to start with but soon began to realize and thing WTF am I doing. Well I finished school and like I said before, I was planning to teach English in SEA. I started speaking to this Thai girl online and my instincts kicked in straight away...but this girl is different and I knew it, I could feel it.
She was from Thailand, so I thoyght to myself, why not go and teach in Thailand and see what she is like. Soon I fell in love with her, for sure you are all thinking "oh no he is in touble, so young and doing this, with a notorious Thai girl". Like I said this girl is not the same...and the secret to finding true love and an honest woman in Thai especially...is to find a girl who has money already, she will love you for you because she does not care about money. I have been living in Thailand for 2 months with this girl and I havn't taught English once, she told me I can not earn a nice living with the money she told me I should start to do soem business with her parents

....I have hit the jackpot and the business is kicking off nicely and we are so in love. I am so lucky and I know it and guess what....she is looking after MY family as much as I do hers, we are both working for our families...whilst making major ฿฿฿฿฿฿฿฿

Thailand is still untapped for many business oppertunities

Thanks for your comments, just thought I would update the situation.

#23 yohan

Posted 31 August 2009 - 09:04 PM

YoungOne, on 31 August 2009 - 08:54 PM, said:

...I have hit the jackpot and the business is kicking off nicely and we are so in love. I am so lucky and I know it and guess what....she is looking after MY family as much as I do hers, we are both working for our families...whilst making major ฿฿฿฿฿฿฿฿

I wonder, what means, 'she is looking after MY family'? 'working for our families'?

Do you have children, who are living with you out of a previous relationship?

I also wonder your visa status, I doubt if you have any labour permit for Thailand. You are working something, you said?

#24 VietfromUSA

Posted 17 November 2009 - 02:01 PM

YoungOne, on 08 October 2008 - 04:57 AM, said:

Hey,
Im young and live in the U.K at the moment, planning to go and tech English in asia. I went to The philippines this summer and met a few girls... from the bar scene.
I became very close to 1 in perticular but i also had feelings for one of the others.
Im back in the U.K now and she(Anne) tells me how much she loves me often. She told me she want nothing from me apart from my love and to be with me. I have also been speaking to the other girl and she tells me how Anna has another customer who she claims to love also. I know she has to work as she has no money, so i can accept this. But not if she loves another guy.

She alwasy tells me how she hasnt been with another guy since i left which i know is a lie because i get told by her friend. Her friend (Alice) also has feelings for me and she seems to be more honest. She want to go back to her province and study at univerity. She has only been workign at the bar for a few months she is 18 and had some very bad luck hich she told me about and then decided to leave her province and become a bar girl but she hates it.

Im split between these girls, i cannot talk to anna about the things she is lieng to me about because i promised her firned i wouldnt because it would cause so much trouble there.

I really dont want to hurt any of these girls... but i have to choose one or none.
I really dont know what to do because i wear my heart on my sleave and have fallen for them both. I dotn know what to beleive anymore.
Alice said she is just tryign to find her prince charming and then she wants to go abck to study, i said i would go and see her in her home province of samar... im pretty sure there are no GIRLY BARS there haha.

I beleive anna is ieing to me but i am finding it hard to let go even though i know if i dotn i will get hurt further down the line.

Alice just seems to be perfect... but i cant let go of Anna

Im probably just an idiot... i want a serious relationship even though im young...

Im just very confused... as i keep thinking to myself Anna could change... but i cant cope with the lieing.

any thought on the situation... sorry about the random layout of the post

Most girls that are in that kind of industry wants a way out. If she's working in a bar, she see's a lot of men.
Their job is to try to make money. After you leave, there will be more guys just like you that she will meet. If she does that all year long, imagine how many guys she can catch w/ the bait. It is a win win for her. 1. There is a high chance you will be back to see her. 2.You might send her money. 3. You might fall in love and merry her.

I've been all over South East Asia, and every time I go there, I always have a following of girls. Why is it that when I am here in the states the girls do not act that way?? And it seems every time I go back there is always new girls that I met and they try to make me fall for them.

If I were you, I would just forget about it. I'm almost 100% sure that if you go back there, It will start all over again. You will meet new girls and they will try to pull the same stuff. I've seen 60 year old men with early 20's girls there. Its all about money. They think every one over seas has money.

#25 YoungOne

Posted 09 May 2010 - 03:43 PM

She looks after My family as in, we send money to my Mum in the UK. We help each others families, her parents work with us, but slightly different work.
Her parents also rent us their land for free, and supervise work...They are too good to me to be honest.
I have no children, i'm 20 years old....
I have a tourist VISA for the moment because it's just easier.
You can PM me about my work if you like, it is industrial work.

#26 MrFantabulous

Posted 10 May 2010 - 09:36 AM

You are very lucky . .but careful if you come to depend on her too much. She is giving you a job, a relationship everything. I'd be putting a lot of your earnings into the bank incase there is a breakup.. because it will also mean the end of your career there too.

#27 teruchan

Posted 10 May 2010 - 11:07 AM

I think many are too quick to jump on the "they are only after your money" bandwagon. Sure, if he was old and established maybe, but remember, Philippines girls outnumber guys 10 to 1. Many girls are never going to have a husband. That's why you see those guys who stand outside with their shirt up rubbing their belly. Some girl is willing to work her ass off and feed and take care of that guy so she can have a husband, even if he does nothing all day.

This kid is 18 years old and a white foreigner? He doesn't have to have a single peso and plenty of girls will love him. Really love him. And yes, they would work and take care of him too. Many girls would be happy to have mixed blood children too.

I am not saying that is the case with the girls in his story, but stranger things... right?

#28 METHOS

Posted 11 May 2010 - 12:13 AM

teruchan, on 10 May 2010 - 11:07 AM, said:

but remember, Philippines girls outnumber guys 10 to 1. Many girls are never going to have a husband.

-Who told you that?

#29 Tatoosh

Posted 11 May 2010 - 10:58 AM

Actually, just count the number of girls in the bar versus the number of customers. Bar girls are bar girls, it depends on her personal experience and time in the bar. I know Filipinas that never worked in a bar, came from "good" families, and are cheating on their husbands whenever they can. Even when their bread is buttered by staying with their husbands.

I know Filipinas that appear to be quite faithful to husbands that are older, ill, and not rich. So it is easy to paint individuals with a broad paintbrush, but not particularly accurate. That said, a relationship with a bar girl, while interesting, is likely to end badly. As to the original poster, at eighteen, he probably needs an educational thump or two.

#30 YoungOne

Posted 11 May 2010 - 02:44 PM

MrFantabulous, on 10 May 2010 - 09:36 AM, said:

I am VERY lucky, I am learning the language very fast, and also all our business contacts know me as well as her. She keeps all the earnings with me, and she accept looking after large amounts. She doesn't care about the money shes just happy I came to Thailand for her and am staying with her. She is just finishing a Law degree from Ramkhamheng Univ, which is a extremely hard degree. This girl is true love, she wants nothing only my love and support mentally.

Not many girls like this in Thailand, maybe not even in this world. I would be a fool to destroy a relationship with such a girl. Funny, intelligent, knoledgable, beuatiful, cute, sexy, loads of friends cooks amazingly and a great family the list can go on and on.

#31 camerata

Posted 11 May 2010 - 02:55 PM

YoungOne, on 11 May 2010 - 02:44 PM, said:

Not many girls like this in Thailand, maybe not even in this world. I would be a fool to destroy a relationship with such a girl. Funny, intelligent, knoledgable, beuatiful, cute, sexy, loads of friends cooks amazingly and a great family the list can go on and on.

Has she got a sister?

#32 abu farsi

Posted 12 May 2010 - 04:33 AM

There are great gals everyplace.

I agree that the guy who says

Quote

"I think many are too quick to jump on the "they are only after your money" bandwagon"

has it fairly clearly.

Yes, you can buy a gal for a night, and she did it for the money. But that is far, far different from actually caring for a sick guy for free, whom she married.

Yes, cash is a factor in many marriages between foreigners and Filipinas. But so is SEX. Each person in the relationship gets something the other did not have before they got married. No relationship is complete black and white as to the reasons they are together. Lets face it, eventually somebody is finally satisfied sexually for a while, and THAT PERSON (wife) is going to be there while there is a recharge. If the time is empty, faked, silent, or full of times where you feel to hide your head in shame, ain't nobody going to stay in that relationship for very long. Plus there is an end to all money, even Bill Gates will be out of money when he spends 5 billion. If you marry for cash, how much cash is enough? How do you decide it?

I used to think I could spot an older bar girl instantly. They have a "look". Tattoos. Smokers. They dress in evening dance clothes at breakfast. Always seem to be selling sexuality in their personality. But after actually meeting many older girls who at one time or another fell on hard times, or had a wild streak when young, I am going to assume making assumptions is usually wrong.

Today I live in a remote farming community. Gossip is everyplace. No secretes in my place. I know who the women are who moved there in order to have family who worked as a GRO when young. In my 5 years there, not a single one of them (15 or so) has indicated that they would trade sex, with me, for cash. It seems they simply got out of the prostitution business, Married Filipino guys and fell into the church mores. Good wives and caring mothers all.

Abu Farsi

#33 YoungOne

Posted 12 May 2010 - 04:48 PM

camerata, on 11 May 2010 - 02:55 PM, said:

Has she got a sister?

She is an only Child

hmm I wish I could delete the start of this post... Don't really want to be associated with it.

#34 Stocky

Posted 12 May 2010 - 05:15 PM

YoungOne said:

..but this girl is different

...aren't they always :rolleyes:

Nevermind an old cynic, glad you've got yourself sorted, here's hoping it doesn't all go tits up; though aged 20 you've nothing to lose.

#35 YoungOne

Posted 13 May 2010 - 01:36 AM

Got myself sorted, also I do have alot to lose

1. Her
2. The opportunity to stay in Thailand at this young age.
3. A potential successful business
4. Higher earnings then possible in the UK at my age.
5. Happiness :blahblah1:

Not going to c**k this one up

#36 MrFantabulous

Posted 13 May 2010 - 11:44 PM

Which is exactly why I said to be careful, and have a backup plan. You got all your eggs in one basket sonny! Her family gave you the business you are doing now and they could just as easily remove you.

Also why are people talking about Phillipino girls?? His gf is Thai isn't she??

Anyhow wish you all the best!

#37 Tatoosh

Posted 14 May 2010 - 09:04 AM

MrFantabulous, you would have to read the original post in this thread, concerning Anne or Anna and her tempting friend Alice, who presented the original poster a perplexing choice, which he solved like Alexander and the Gordian Knot. He simply cut his choices and started new, in a different location than the Philippines.

#38 robo4711

Posted 19 May 2010 - 01:14 PM

YoungOne, on 08 October 2008 - 04:57 AM, said:

Believe half of what you see and nothing of what you hear you think Alice is going to tell you the truth when she wants you too wake up my friend keep them both twice the fun as for the lying they can't help it get used to it or get out now I don't know one bar girl that dosn't do in fact most have Phd's in the subject.

This post has been edited by robo4711: 19 May 2010 - 01:22 PM